2018 will forever be one of the worst years of my life. There were moments where I wanted to give up on everything – professional and personal.
RAD AND HUNGRY is still very much a dream job but what happens when I don't have the energy and will to share my life when the company is based on my crazy adventures? What happens when I’m forced to slow down because everyone in my life is depending on me? When all I want is a break from the battle to brush my teeth and have a decent cup of coffee? How am I supposed to feel when the person I trusted most proves me wrong? What do I do when you know you gotta battle through one more day but give no fucks?
I focused on one big goal that I’ve had forever – hit 80 counties by the end of 2018. It became my mantra – 80 in 2018. It wasn't always easy focusin’ on it, and I gave up when I hit another low so low that it seemed impossible. A friend checkin’ in asked – Why give up? And just like I was back on the hunt. 78 countries down and 60 days left in 2018, I booked a ticket and started counting down the days till I'd conquer my goal.
In Tenerife – drink in hand and watchin’ the sun set in my 80th M’THR F’IN country. Africa in the far distance and a whole lotta of the world to still explore... holy fuck this is why I grind so hard and push past pain. 100-hr weeks, nonstop from one task to the next, stomaching emotional beat downs and physical exhaustion because I'm forever chasin’ freedom.
2019 is just getting started, and I'm trying to sort out necessary changes to get shit back on track. No denying a series of hiccups and trip-ups are in store, and I'll be beating myself up for not being able to smoothly navigate this messy space I created. I'm frustrated that I'm here, 2018 feels like a broken record that kept skippin’, reminding me that I've missed a beat and keep on slippin’.
But low-down adventures never are smooth. They’re a whole lot of faith with a heavy dose of dreamin’. Yes, I'm drowning. But I'm winning little battles that are restorin’ my belief that I can do this, that I got it in me to keep my dream alive. That I'm gonna be alright.
Now, where's my next adventure?
(OK... The Canary Islands technically are part of Spain, BUT if you're knocking out the Traveler's Century Club 100 minimum then it does count ‘cause it requires a flight or a boat ride to reach from mainland Spain.)